Rob Olsen's Blog for whats going on in my life

Well todays a sad day for many of my closest family. My brothers best and closest friend Tito died yesterday evening from a massive heartache, it was sudden and fatal. My entire house is a wreck. I woke up to find my mother crying her eyes out and my father holding back tears. His father knowing how much Tito ment to us, he personally came out to tell us. That shows amazing strength of character on his part. It was weird because as much as I wanted to cry with my mother I couldn't. So I left the house and with in minutes I couldn't stop crying, I guess subconsciously I couldn't cry in front of her. Tito was one of those quiet souls who never did harm to anyone, and would be there whenever you know you joke or a nice gesture. He was only 13 years old when he passed yesterday, but I really believe he would have been a strong good man, the kind of man I confused lost soul like myself could have turned to. I don't know if or why God would take a boy like that from us, but I can't see in it any reason to do it. I pefer to think theres no grand scheme to any of it. I do hope your okay in Haven TIto, I wasn't always that nice to becuase Im a bit of dick, but lot of people are going to miss you, including me, kid, be good.

Hello everyone, two months and counting until I blast of for Richmond, VA. I should have all of my bills paid except for my 15000 dollar computer before I leave. I haven't figured what to do about that one yet, but I have a few ideas. Well not much going on in my little life right now. Just waiting out my time. I feel kinda like a convict who knos he has a just a few more weeks until he get a second chance at life. Its really very exicting and nervewrecking at the same time. Im trying to figure out what I should do when I get out. Im probbaly going to return to school, but I thinking about moving to Boston instead of back to NC. The reason is I have been dealing with this need to be in an area with more intellitical class and less country, relgious rednecks. Don't get me wrong thier not bad people, I just need something else out of life, a chance to start over. And I heard Boston is a fun city for the young twenty-somethings, with lots to do, so I might move there, but its still up in the air. If I do move back here I think I like to live in garner or Apex, rather then Raliegh, its too expense. Well to we meet again readers. Good Bye.

This is the last post of the year, so I just want to say how much I appreciate those of you who reads this so that you can now whats going on with my life and what I have been thinking about. Not much to report, except that todays been a good day. I decided that today would be one of those days where I catch up on all of those things I never have time for anymore, so I went to the museum and say the Mone't showcase. It was excellent then a saw a movie and later tonight im going to see a folk singer at my coffe house it's truly been a great day. My life seems to be doing alright, christmas is over so that one less headache for me to have to deal with. I I found out what happened with that Brook girl, it turns out people told her about many romantic ecounters and my hedionest ways and she being the kind of girl who doesen't approve of that kind of lifestyle, wanted nothing to do with me after that. What's really funny is it really was something I did. So I guess the joke was on me. Well have a happy new year everyone and be safe. PEACE OUT!!!

Well everyone its been a busy few weeks. The good news is I got into the Job Corp, and I will be leaving for Richmond Virginia in March. That bad news is im a screw up. I was at work yesterday when a friend of mine named Alferda said to me that my life seems like a soap opera, at after thinking about it I realized it very much was. The serious of funny things that have happened to me really are quite funny when you think it about and would in fact make great melodrama. Well that thing with Brook fell apart completly. But after several days of misery im okay know. I also had a anthor girl my buddy danny liked tell me she never liked him, rather she liked me. I cant really understand it. It seems that I probbaly should never hang out with girls he likes because I only screw things up for him. I was thinking about why people keep journals and blogs the other day, its not so people can know what they thinking and doing and its not so people can rember what they have done, I decided its so they proof that you exstied at all. Its this modern world its important for everyone to put down words in some form so they records of thier life for future generations to rember. I might go on to do something great or I might not but this blog shows I exstited and thats what matters in the end.

Good Evening readers. Well Not to much going on I screwed things up with the new girl Brook im dating. I let my jeoulse nature get the best of me, and as a result I really fucked up things up with her, but hey thats what happens when your me, you screw things up. I suprised her with some flowers on her doorstep I hope that does the trick but who knows. Well thats all for today. Adio's.

Well hey we go on our own, going down the only road we ever known: Whitesnake. Well for some reason that line from theat song seems to really say what it is im doing as of late. Life seems to be one seroius of sititions that are incredbily simmelry to the last. Im alive and thats something to be proud of but I can't shake this enease that seems to follow me everyone, and then whenever im alone I get this strange urge to roll up into a ball and cry, as if Ill end up being alone for ever. Its really very unpleasent. I been trying to sit down and write but I can't seem to ever get started. Im as the french would "le' Mess". But hey thats the life of an individual haunting but too much thinking and not enough action. I recetnly had a amazing understanding of one of my own faults. Its become clear to me that when ever I do something good or unselfish I have a need to point it out to everyone so someone, anyone, will give me praise. Its got me worried that Im not the selfless person I claim to be, but rarther a glory whore. Well until meet again, farewell loyal readers, who ever you are.

Well its been a long strange trip. Where to begin. After having a big fight with my parents they told me I had to be out of the house by Jan 31st. So as a result I had to drop my army plans and look for an alterante plan. So I checked in the Job corp again. After running around getting together varoius documents I have my interview Dec 7th. According to my addmission counslor its a done deal im in. If this is true I be leaving as early as Jan. Normally I be happy but for one thing. Before I explain what that one thing is letting me point out how once again nothing that seems to be good when it happens to me is ever good. After that insictint with Paulina and then my fling with Trish, I met a nice girl named brook. She's cute, nice and really very attractive, but the wierd part is that she really likes me. We sat up the other night and just talked for hours, not bullshit talk but deep intresting converstion, I haven't met a girl like then in a very long time. But of course in as little as 2 months I be leaving for Tennesse. This is of course my luck. I have also been fighting back tears over and over again lately. I find I hate to be alone, as if being alone will last forever. Its madding, well happy thanksgiving everyone, bye.

Its October already, where has the year gone. I often fear that when I wake up again i'll be ninty-nine and on my death bed because that how fast my life seems to moveing. I swear the last four years of my life happened all at once, and yet i got nothing to show for it except for some pictures and plenty of memories. Things have gotten better on a personal note as of late. I have worked things out with all involvned parties involving my screwed up personal life. I start back at the gym tomorrow and I even lost a few pounds in the past few weeks. All of these things good. Well good day to all of my loyal readers, who ever you are.

Well what to report and where to begin. Well theres a girl i work with named Paulina. My buddy danny liked her but it didn't work out so I jumped on it and after spending the last couple weeks hanging out and fooling around it seemed we were more or less together, but last night I learned differently. We were hanging and trying to find someone to hang out with, so I called a friend of mine named, Danny, who had just got out the service. He invites us over to hangout and have a few beers, sounds like a good call to me. We go over there and she gets smashed off like 3 beers, it was kinda of scary. So I step out side for a smoke and come back in only to find Danny and Paulina going at in the living room. Here where it gets wierd, I couldn't yell or anything I just turned around and went back outside, smoked anothor cigeratte and then came back in the house shouted I was leaving and I left. I can't figure out why I didn't say something, I think maybe I felt I didn't have a right to say anything we hadn't been together that long. Regardless I was so angry and upset I couldn't sleep so I called in sick and slept most of the day away. I haven't figured out what im gonna do now, but I have a feeling its gonna be a mess.

My mind is becoming twisted by the dark thing that is Wal-Mart 3rd shift. I over slept by like 5 hours from when I ment to get up. I then got up and had pick up my buddy danny for school. I was supposed to get him at 9AM, but I didn't pick him up untill almost 11:30. I also missed my only class I have to today, I'm just doing so great today. Its shaping up to be a anthor fun day for me in my fun, wait I ment, misbreble, life. Well Choa, everyone.

Not much new to report. I stil having been able to strarighten out the whole mess with my education award, which means I probbaly going to have drop all but on eof my classes. Not a good way to start off the semester. I just found out the girl I'm currently infuiated with is seeing someone, just my luck of course. The Funny thing is that she told me even though she could see her self dating me and being very happy in the proccess it just wasn't the right time. Now I would normaly see that as a blow off but I had fooled around this girl allitle, so I tend not to see it that way. As a result of this im honestly alitle pissed and upset. Its funny really becasue before we messed around I liked her but someone following that event I really started to like her. I think its because I saw her open up and become vurnable, I find that to be the thing that makes me really care about someone else. Those of you her know me know I lust alot, a hell of alot but I really only can reach a higher level of imintancy with women who open and show thier inner selfs. Just out of curiosity I believe no one really reads my blog, so if you do read my blog please leave a comment in the guestbook located at the bottom of the screen. Well till next time, Peace!

Good day everyone. I got yet anthor series of problems that shows that God made me for shits and giggles. First off I found out two days ago that I'm not allowed to work second shift and as a result i'm being forced to work thrid shift again or take a leap of asbence. I of course can't work thrid shift because I started school yesterday, so I'm currently and royal fucked. This brings me to my second problem, Wake Tech is no longer allowing me to buy books or my parking permit with my Education Award, and to make things worse I just found out that my payment for last sesmeter never went through. So now I don't have a paycheck coming in becasue I can't work and now I have to find the money for my text books, which are going to cost me around $230, which I don't have. The head of the finincial aid office said she put me in for an emergency loan, which of course I have to pay back, ecxept that I don't have that money to begin with, so yet again I'm being fucked!!! Well thats enough bitching for today. Until next time, adio`s.

well look i'm updating my blog within five days of my last post. Well to begin I went to that free show downtown yesterday. I was supossed to go with my friend Sarah yesterday but I guess we had a misunderstanding about what excatly we were doing and she made plans with her friend Jamie to go. I would have gone with her except Jamies husband was watching her daughter so they could go and I didn't want to be in the way. It really sucks because I waited around all day to go with her thier. After I finnaly got ahold of her and found out she was going with her friend. I got sad and alittle pissed off. So I went down to the corner bar and had a few drinks. After some thinking and a couple of beers to lossen my head I decieded, fuck it, I'd go anyway, so off I went. I actully made it straight thier, which was amazing becasue I wasn't really sure where downtown it was. I got there found parking and went in. It sucked the beer was over priced and it was incredble overcrowed. i walked around and tried to see if I recogizned any one know, but no luck. I then tried to reach the stage ablosulty no luck in that one. Tired and bored I left about 10:00 and went home. Anthor excting day in the life Robert A Olsen. Best wishes to all of my readers.

well I'm having a great day as always. The last couple of days has been the pitts. I had a party made some mistakes and now i get to have the fun of dealing with my mistakes. Life just keeps getting better and better by the day. Yeah me. Well I have began the long proccess of saving the thing that I screwed up so in time it won't seem so bad. Any way I'm doing quite well other then that. To all of you wonderfull people out thier in PC Land goodnight.

Good day to all of you out there in computer land. A long time no post. I haven't much going on in my life as of late. I seem to sleep and work most all of the time anymore. I been sorting alot of things out as of late try to make sense of the misery I find myself locked in. I wonder if thier is a way out and I keep planning and thinking of new options. It's this never ending hope of mine that has been keeping me going all of this time. Ive found two options that seem promising, one is the job corp, which honestly i don't really want to do it but its an option. The second option is my friend joe has offered me a place to stay in Boston Mass. if i'm intrested. That two is an option. Well sorry it took so long for me to Post everyone who likes to check in on my fucked up little life.

Holy Shit has it really been that long since i posted. I can't really think of what to say. Its been a long and crazy ride. I've shifted my work schudule from 2nd to 3rd shift. I start the week after memeroial day. i realize i'm becoming more and more tired of my life. I keep asking God what i should do, but i know that he has already told me. tonight I hung out with my friend Candience, I love that girl she's great, but somehow I ended up back at that damn Fuquay bar, After hours. I can't seem to escape the fate i put myself in. I need to go in the Army. Its the only chance I got to be happy. I really believe God is directed me in that way. I wornder then why it is i'm so scared to do it. I begining to feel my loneless even when I'm sourened by my friends. Thats one of the worst things in the world, to feel lonely with friends. I need to escape and find some happniess, or maybe just a girl friend as my parents love to say. Well Sorry its been so long since i dropped a line. Adios'.

Well today the begging of my eight days of work straight. Alot has happened in the last couple of days. The biggest would be the passing of my friend Kerri. She has left behind a year and half old baby boy and a her fiance. She was killed on the way to work. I will be honest we were not that close but haveing lost someone so dear to me only months ago, i understand and can sympathy with her pain. Also while on this subject my fiend micheccile's father passed away after fighting schlorisis of the liver for several weeks. Its sad that as soon as the weather passes from winter to spring so man bad things are happining. It truly is a shame. On a lighter note I ran into the younger sister of my nieghbors across the street the other day. We had some drinks at the bar and it was alot of fun. She gave me her number and told me to call her, I think she wants to go out some time, but i'm really out of practice so i can't really read her singnals. The joke i did on myspace has gotten terrrible out of control. The girl who i wrote to did not repond back so no good can come from that. Other then that, thats about everything. I will be back.

Hello everybody, It's me Docter Nick, or Rob, whatever. Well where to begin. Its been a boring couple of days. Having bounced several checks I've found myself very poor and as a result i find myself increeible bored. The only thing i did besides work was grabing a drink with some friends last thursday night. That was fun. My friend Candince called me at 10 AM this morning because she couldn't go to class but she couldn't go to home so she came over and spent the day here. That was fun. Last night I decided to actully answer one of those damn myspace posts. I answered it with really funny answers and I can't wait to hear whats comming next. HE, HE, HE.

Well it would appear im not to good with this blog stuff. Let me recap quickly the last twelve days. i drank to much twice. A friend made out with anthor one of my friends on the hood of my car. I worked way too much, almost got thrown out of my house. Decided to hand over my entire months wages to my parents so that I might pay off my loan in a 3-4 months. Am nowing planning on movieing out by this july or august. Decided to not take any classes this summer so i can work more. Anything else, nope that about sums it up. I did finanly start writting down the story of my late friend Amanda, Hrsar-Boryla. But do to my late nights and several papers i had to write i haven't gotten to far. Will be posting it by Friday. Keep your fingers crossed. i really that I beggining to have strange realaztion about life. As an example the other day i was driving down the road listing to NPR, National Public Radio, when for some reason the thought just poped in my head about how amazing it is we can talk. Then I thought about how it baffles the mine that children can learn and comprend speech. Well enough about my musings. Till we meet again.

Well what a couple of days ive had. I worked and felt more disapointment then usal in the last couple of days. I found myself Monday night out with danny and his sort of girl friend Samantha. Beside there countiouns acts of affection i manged to have fun except that Samantha kept trying to get me to talk. Its not that I don't like her its just i don't always feel like talking. Then of course llast night tuesday, i worked and that was to bad except that I called my friend Jessica who has not returned my calls the last three or four times i called but she answered said she called me back but she didn't. You know i really begining to think I should just be celbiate or go and get a hooker. Its funny right before starting to write this I saw car flying through a parking lot and i imeadtily thought of stepping in front of it. That kinda scares me. But don't worry i won't be doing that. Adios.

This is my first posting. So I'll get started and say my peace. I went to the beach with some friends and despite the great weather some of the company i kept was so miserable that i actully didn't have all that fun. The day before that the army told me that i was .01 Body fat off from what they would except from me so know I have to wait until fucking June 21st to try again. But hey atleast i passed the physical. You might guess that i didn't have all that much fun today over the weekend but I did see an intrsting movie at the independent theater called CSA. It was a what if thing about if the Confedercy had one the civil war. It will shake you up and disguste you but i suggest it as a solid pick if you want to see something that will make you think. Well I have to go I promised my friend danny i would find something for us to do today. Hope you all come back tomorrow to read some more.